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Game Details
| Date/Time: |
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
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| Location: |
http://www.buzzflash.org
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| Score: |
81 - 19
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| Winner: |
George W. Bush |
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George "The Decider" Bush
Right from his first moments in the big leagues, we knew Georgie's sticky fingers would take him far. Boy were we right about that -- what a steal!
Coach Rove loved him for his flexibility and he's always been a team player. His dynastic background meant he had to work twice as hard to be taken seriously, and wow, did he blow his old man out of the water. His verbal acrobatics and penchant for nicknames made him a favorite on and off the court, and "Merica" will never be the same without him.
Lucky for us, he's come out of retirement for a victory lap, not that he hasn't done enough damage to the opposition already. Talk about Mission Accomplished! He still sports a powerful fake out, though, so watch out for this falling star -- he may not be out to pasture just yet. |
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Mitch "Moneybags" McConnell
When you first look at Mitch McConnell, you might not think he's too evil. He has a doofus sort of face and his real first name is Addison. But let's shake down his numbers: a perfect score from the American Conservative Union in 2006. Opposes campaign finance regulation on First Amendment grounds. Hypocritical on whether White House aides should testify. Introduced the Protect America Act of 2007, a distasteful, deplorable anti-4th Amendment bill that allowed the warrantless monitoring of communications inside and outside the U.S.
And being from Kentucky, McConnell has to know basketball, especially on defense, a skill developed by being the Senate Minority Leader. When you combine McConnell with his wife, Elaine "Do nothing as Secretary of Labor" Chao, they form a mighty pair. While technically McConnell is currently the sanest U.S. Senator from Kentucky (Jim Bunning is your other choice), he is still plenty arrogant and very evil. |
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